Ruben picks apart the useless spam he receives from the spamming spammers who spam him with their spammingly spammish spam.

Finally the real thing – no more tip-offs! Enhancment Patches are hot right now, VERY hot! Unfortunately, most are cheap imitiations and do very little to increase your size and stamina. Well this is the real thing, not an imitation! One of the very originals, the absolutely strongest Patch available, anywhere!

The patches are the easiest and most effective way to increase your size. You won’t have to take pills, get under the knife to perform expensive and very painful surgery, use any pumps or other devices. No one will ever find out that you are using our product. Just apply one patch on your body and wear it for 3 days and you will start noticing dramatic results.

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Yeah, patches. And anti-ageing cremes remove wrinkles. And smashing a mirror gives you seven years of bad luck.