Infrequently asked questions
SoftwareMost comments on technical posts end up divolving into several predictable anti-patterns. Rather than preempting them each time, I’ve included them below to link to for future reference, along with a few other common ones.
- Why not allow people to post comments?
- Spam, and because this is my part of the web. There are instructions on how to contact me on each post, which may get reposted. Better yet, I encourage you to start your own blog, link to my post, and comment away.
- Aren't you just afraid of people calling you out?
- No.
- May I pay to write a guest post?
- I used to say “sure, as long as I can say it was paid for.” Funnily enough, unsolicited advertisers dropped pretty fast after that.
- You used software/hardware foo? Why not bar?
- The situation, either by choice or necessity, called for foo. If you’re that threatened by that, you may need some help.
- Why didn't you mention bar or [pendantic nitpick]?
- Because I can see the forest for the trees.
- LOL you used foo! Or you're a sucker for thinking [this]!
- And yet you didn’t find it pointless/stupid enough to avoid commenting. May I recommend this towel for wiping the egg off your face.
- Why didn't you do bar?
- In the words of Merlin Mann, why am I not a potted fern?
- Why would you solve such an obscure/old/irrelevent-to-me problem?
- That time you use to complain? I solve problems with it instead.
- Why are you so boring/full of shit/weird?
- Because I'm not a class act, like you.
- You could have written that script in one line, or done this shortcut...
- And for illustrative purposes, I didn’t.
- Why is your taste in anime/jazz/movies so terrible?
- Because it makes you squirm.
- I might not agree with everything you write, but thanks for all the fish.
- Thanks. The internet needs more people like you.