I’m relieved that...


I was in a bit of a weird mood this afternoon, so decided to make note of various things I’m relived of. Specifically, I’m relieved that:

  • … I don’t sneeze out my ears, or I’d have to apologise to people on both sides.

  • … I don’t have to drink battery acid under the justification that it’s healthy; it tastes and smells revolting.

  • … I’m not racist, then have to make excuses about how some of my best friends are of a certain ethnicity.

  • … a plunger, a bit of filter paper, and a specific kind of powdered bean are all that are necessary to make the world’s best beverage.

  • … spices are still considered healthy, given we can’t eat bread and rice now.

  • … people can be excited for things, even if they’d bore me.

  • … most doors have handles along their edge, to afford us maximum leverage.

  • … bagels only have one hole for filling to fall out of.

  • … I don’t care about matching socks.

  • … I’m not currently stuck in a tree, or underground in a bus covered in concrete or an impermiable slab of stale cheese.

  • … I can be.

Author bio and support


Ruben Schade is a technical writer and IaaS engineer in Sydney, Australia who refers to himself in the third person in bios. Wait, not BIOS… my brain should be EFI by now.

The site is powered by Hugo, FreeBSD, and OpenZFS on OrionVM, everyone’s favourite cloud infrastructure provider.

You can leave me a comment by contacting me, and I might publish your thoughts. Please read the FAQs first though.

If you found this post helpful or entertaining, you can shout me a coffee or buy some silly merch. Thanks!